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(I found the following posted to the Colorado Soccer Net in response to a series of messages berating referees. Feel free to pass it along; I do.)
I think I have it.
Americans are an independent people. We'll put up with almost anything except:
1. being told what to do and
2. not feeling important.
You can see the results of this each day, with people running red lights, putting too many (>12) power bars on the express checkout line, barking orders into their cell phones while driving one-handed at 4:45 pm on I45 @ 80mph, and generally behaving like spoiled toddlers.
Understand, I'm not making value judgments, just observations.
So here is this referee, standing directly in the path of little Justin, Kimberly, Jordan, Amber, or Caitlyn's self-actualization. Who the hell IS this guy? Is he/she more qualified to pass judgment on my kid than her coach, than ME?
Oh, bleep! That kid was offside(s)! That was a hand ball! That kid pushed Tyler from behind! Ref, are you blind? Are you stupid? Are you biased? Are you BRIBED? How dare you dink with ME!!!! Or, with MY kid!!!!!!!!
Sorry. Got carried away.
People, soccer is a game. For most of us, that's all it will ever be. One or two kids from your club will go to University on a soccer scholarship, but most will not. One or two kids from your state might play professional ball, here or abroad, but most will not. It is unlikely that anyone you will ever meet makes their living from soccer.
Players play soccer because it's fun, it's challenging, it makes them feel part of a team, and it's fun. (Feel free to contribute your kids' reasons.) They don't usually do it because you want them to, although that has been known to happen.
I can say, with confidence, that at least a few quit the game because of the nasty, hyper, and disproportionate aggression shown by the people who come to games and expect only victory, and the humiliation of the other team.
You think the refs TRY to hurt you and yours? I think not. Do YOU need (for your kid) to win so badly that you don't care about the damage you cause?
If you believe that you can do better, play, coach, get certified to referee, learn. Learn soccer. Do some games. Play some games. Make our sport the exception to the excesses of our culture. Show YOUR KIDS that you understand why we're all doing the same sport, and that you value effort, and team, and loyalty, and respect, and 'paying your dues' more than you demand to win. Please, think about what you are teaching your kids... they're the only worthwhile thing(s) we will leave behind.
Solomon
05/30/01
(If you wish to comment on this article, send a message to basra@basra-refs.org.)
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